The woes of an only child

As Chris and I are cleaning up dinner, talking about random things, the Monkey, in the other room playing with the dog, stops and then comes up to me and whispers she needs to talk to me in the other room. She leans up to my ear and whispers:

“You and dad have known each other for years and had years to talk before I was even born. So really, if I have something to say to you, you should just let me interrupt because when you make me wait until you’re done talking, I forget what I wanted to tell you. And you have had years to talk to him. Really.”

Me: *speechless*

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A day later, as I’m trying to get her to go to sleep:

Monkey: “mama, I feel like since we got Louie (our dog) you really only pay attention to him and dad now. You barely pay attention to me.”

Me: “when do you think I’m not paying attention to you? Or is this just an attempt to stall because you don’t want to go to sleep?”

Monkey: “Well, I can tell you the next time you do it.  I can get a piece of paper, and when you’re paying attention to me I can draw you a star. And when you’re not, you’ll get a zero”

Me: “ok, go to sleep”

Me relating the story back to Chris: “Did our daughter just put you on a behavior plan?”

Can’t wait to see how many stars I get...