Conversations with the monkey

Monkey: I don’t like [student’s name]. He’s WAY too silly
Chris: what do you mean he’s way too silly. You’re pretty silly
Monkey: yeah, but I’m only silly at home. I’m always serious at school or camp
Chris and me: mhmmmm

————
Trying to get everyone in the car...
Chris: why is it you only have two speeds? Really fast or really slow?
Monkey gives the side eye and purposefully slows down more
Me: haha...you know you’re describing yourself too, chris.
Monkey: I have two speeds. Really fast and really slow. Dada has to speeds. Really fast and really slow. And mama is just really really slow.

I mean, she’s not wrong.